Grief #2

Deactivated. I keep thinking about it for many days ever since social media has become crowded and loud. I know that it's the freedom of expression platform so the control on what to see and what to feel will be far from a peaceful community.   The feature before was a month's silence from it... Continue Reading →

Grief #1

This virus has taken so many lives and the number just keeps on adding up as the day goes on without any vaccinations. It's toil for everyone,and in this season I can't help but think of the grief that takes over the people who experience death of loved one or the griping pain of having... Continue Reading →

I should write a book

It's been said for many years passed - write a book. I would like to think that it's easy as ABC. Like learning to recognize left hand from right hand. Or maybe like breathing - unintended but will surely occur. But writing a book is like carrying a child and giving birth. Months, days, hours... Continue Reading →

Narrative

This is how I experienced my last panic attack, I was puzzled and scared. It feels like dying yet unsure because I want to fight for my life. And in those moments I have my sister to grab me back to reality that I must survive and live through that night. I can't remember when... Continue Reading →

Shaken

Today, I am shaking inside - it feels like all things I held on to crumbled and piece by piece scattered in all places that surround me. I wanted to gather them and put them back together but I felt tired inside - it's as if anytime it will still crumble that way. How are... Continue Reading →

Essentials

I lose the number of days we are in quarantine with different terms. Exhausted, tired, frustrated - I can list down all the negative emotions I've been through. Daily was like a roller coaster ride but uncertain with the highs and lows, even when there will be the next blows or will there be time... Continue Reading →

Daan lang saglit…

Ganito yan, may isang medyo ma-edad na lalaki ang nagsabi sa akin seeing me wearing make up at the office. "Bakit single ka pa din?" And like any other day mag smile lang ako kasi ayoko sumagot dahil ayoko ng mag explain. Sabi nya, may kaibigan ka naman na mga lalaki, "Opo, meron naman po" ... Continue Reading →

What do You see?

She gave this name to the Lord who spoke to her: “You are the God who sees me,” for she said, “I have now seen the One who sees me.”   ~Genesis 16:13   Have you eyes of flesh? Do you see as man sees? ~Job 10:4   When I look in the mirror, I can't help but... Continue Reading →

XOXO

Lots.   Like this one I felt I am running out of time. I'm still here, the status I've been for a while.   This is raw. The depth of yearn I'm going through, moments like today.   I felt I need to settle soon, but it can't be with someone, because I don't know... Continue Reading →

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